Now that you have learned WHY choosing to save all sexual activity for marriage is important, you can learn HOW to make it happen. Setting your boundaries and committing to them is a great way to get a fresh start, no matter what you have or haven't done in the past.
Dating relationships are often the first opportunity you will have to discuss sex, abstinence and your boundaries. Though not always easy, setting boundaries is necessary. It is NEVER okay for anyone to pressure you to do something you are uncomfortable with--especially sexually. Remember: in a healthy relationship, you will not feel pressured or obligated to do anything that goes against your morals or values.
- Being abstinent is always easy because temptation can make it more difficult.
- Setting boundaries EARLY in your dating relationship and friendships is the best way to avoid risky behavior.
- It IS possible to say "no" to sexual activity!
- One of the most important part of achieving abstinence/secondary abstinence is a commitment to yourself.
How can you benefit from choosing abstinence/secondary abstinence?
Physical - STD free, no worry about unplanned pregnancy, no cancers caused by HPV, no PID caused by Chlamydia/Gonorrhea
Emotional - increase self-respect, develop character, better relationships, clear conscience - no guilt, regret, confidence in yourself
Mental - stress free, takes the pressure off, create memories with your spouse-not others, no comparisons, not wondering if they like you for you
Social - reach your goals, people will admire you, trust with parents, your spouse will thank you, teaches you to respect others
How can you make it easier on yourself to be abstinent?
- Avoid temptations
- Have self-control
- Set boundaries
- Make a commitment
- Avoid viewing sexually explicit tv/movies
- Don't let your past determine your future
- Focus on your goals
- Learn creative ways to say "no"
- Know your reasons why you are staying abstinent. People might ask so have an answer prepared!
- Go on group dates
- Surround yourself with friends who will support your decision to be abstinent.
- Avoid drugs and alcohol
Each day brings a fresh start so it's never to late to set healthy boundaries in your life! Whether you have been sexually active or not, choosing abstinence NOW can give you freedom from the possible negative consequences of sexual activity. Life is full of hard choices, but your decision to abstain from sexual activity until marriage is the safest and healthiest way to protect your body, heart, mind and future!